Memo from the Legal Dept. at "I Bet I Do...Chris"

Hello fellow Bloggers! This is just a quick note from the always pro bono legal department here at the 26th best Buffalo-centered sports blog in the state of Virginia (watch out BriereBlogBoys.com - we're right on your tail!). As many of you are already aware, one of my favorite sports blogs, WithLeather, was recently featured in a Washington Post article. At issue - the above 18-year-old female athlete (also at issue - can a newspaper article be held legally responsible for forcing me to beat off under my desk at work while on a conference call with a federal judge? Apparently, the answer is no, but I'm not cleaning that mess up!) Now, the point of the WP article was that WithLeather may have gone too far with its sexual ramblings about young Allison - detailing how WithLeather faced possible legal action for the use of her photo (which has since been removed from the site). This got me thinking - what are our legal obligations with this blog? Could the Skaptain file a civil suit for unlicensed use of his likeness? What about for those photos that we took of him after he passed out (all 159 of them)? Does a certain independent film director have a legal action for defamation of his fine underground homoerotic touch-football movie? Should our female ombudsman be held responsible for all those terrible things she writes about Bobby B in her little journal? The answer to all of this is no, so keep up the good work! (Editor's Note: The author of this post is not a licensed attorney and all legal advice is for entertainment purposes only).

The greater point is that we need to learn from WithLeather if this blog is ever going to make it big - we need more photos like above (which, I might add, is still causing me intense cockpain and forced me to write this entire post with my one free hand) and we need more immature things to say about her - especially since she's practically asking for it. She's a POLE VAULTER for God's sake! It's basically a synonym for "Cock Jumping" (which could, and should, be a sport) and is the most phallic sport outside of a hot dog eating contest. We need to be at the forefront of misogynistic sports commentary, which is why I'm currently trying to get those bogus indecent exposure charges expunged from my record so I can go back near the local high school and cover the ample (and supple) female sports scene.

So, in conclusion, I propose a 10% reduction in Buffalo-felating, and a 50% increase in random shots of hot trim. Or we could just keep posting photos of you guys playing pong outside. Either way is OK for me.